“ability to express yourself and your rights without violating the rights of others”
Hi!
Im new into this area and I have some problem with aggresion and found this is the way i should use instead of aggresivness!
Because of aggresivness, a relationship has been broken down because of my problem. Ive been reading alots of it and it seems a good things to tell clearly what i fell and what right i have in a calm and clearly way.
I thinks this problem with my aggresivness(passive sometimes) primarily came from my disabilities as hearing impaired.
The problem ive been came into is that almost impossible conversation with assertiveness vs. assertivness people. Because of that problem it seems hard to get some agrement with each other when they speak freely about they feeling and the other one want to express about that feeling and so on. It seems getting into a loop where no one will “win” this situation. Ive been always saying to assertivness people like this “Yes i know you feeling and problem but you need to know also the concequens about beign assertive that you actually have to hold you statement and listen what i or other have to say than just say what you want and then dont bother about it, isnt fair to anyone of us when you speak freely and dont care about to hear others opinion.” So far ive done this statement (correct if it wrong or right statement) al people that claim they are assertiveness say kind of “i have right to say what i want” “i have right not to care” “i have right to change my mind”. Anyone know how to deal this kind of problem would be great to solve almost al kind communication failure with assertivness vs. assertiveness…
Well my english isnt great. I can explain better if there are statement that confused and i do my best to try again!
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This assertiveness training course will help to build your confidence and show you assertiveness techniques that you can adopt to improve your quality of life
This 1 day Assertiveness training course provides practical guidance to delegates, improving confidence, feeling comfortable asking for what they want, being able say no when appropriate and feeling better about themselves.
Being assertive is not about ‘not caring’ or ‘not taking rsponsibiliy’ for ones actions. It is true that everyone has a right to say what they are feeling and to say if they are unhappy about something, but it is still important to listen to and consider anothers point of view. It is not about winning. It is about being feeling able to express yourself, and accepting that everyone has thier own point of view that may not be the same as yours. If someone thinks they have a ‘right not to care’ or does not listen to another they are being agressive not asseritve.
Comment by: admin — January 21st, 2008 at 3:38 pm #
Ahh great admin it seems that my point of dealing this was kind right that is an “responsible” to take the action to also listen to ppl than just speak out feeling and idea and then dont care what other thinks. Well then my basic knowlegde about it wasnt wrong
Thx
Comment by: Deka.D — January 21st, 2008 at 3:49 pm #
I’m toying between a Tony Robbins course or a Tony Buzan course in the UK. I’m enjoying your site and will start writing more comments from now on.
Comment by: Learning Assertive And Communication Skills — February 6th, 2008 at 8:19 am #
The article was very informative. Thank you.
I have a question.Assertiveness also relates to your existence as well. I have met a few people in my career who dont welcome assertivess of the team. They need people nodding heads at them, be the point valid or not. How do we deal such people, because if we try to say ‘NO’ or if we try to propose a new and much more effective solution, they take it as a word against them and dont think about solving the problem. Please advise me on how to deal with people like that.
Comment by: buddy — February 19th, 2008 at 4:07 pm #
There will always be people who will take any response rather than total agreement as a personl critisism. They will find it difficult to deal deal with assetive others. There is little you can do to change their beliefs and values. However you could try agreeing with them before adding your suggestion. For example, yes I think that is a great idea, we could even do it this way …It is important to stay calm - calm assertive is the most effective way - repeating your idea for example, yes I understand your point however I believe that ….Make them feel important, say that is a good way of doing things, have you considered …You can bring others inot the conversation by asking what others think rather that throwing control back.
Good luck
Comment by: admin — February 22nd, 2008 at 1:04 pm #
Good post. You make some great points that most people do not fully understand.
“Because of aggresivness, a relationship has been broken down because of my problem. Ive been reading alots of it and it seems a good things to tell clearly what i fell and what right i have in a calm and clearly way.”
I like how you explained that. Very helpful. Thanks.
Comment by: chiz — March 28th, 2008 at 1:52 pm #